Week Four: Rebels is Capturing #1 Top Power Rank

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Here is photo showing confrontation between Red Army soldiers and alleged leader of Ole Miss Rebels, known as Colonel Reb. Is only one to two dozen tailgating fans being killed, maximum.

[CLICK FOR ZOOM] Here is photo showing confrontation between Red Army soldiers and alleged leader of Ole Miss Rebels, alias “Colonel Reb”. This is location near The Grove tailgate party in Oxford, Mississippi SSR. Is only small number of casualties at tailgate.


Is very unpopular word to members of central politburo. When early draft of this blog post is being sent to Goskomizdat for fact-checking, top officials is making small mistake, calling for Red Army to invade town of Oxford and crush Mississippi SSR rebellion. Commie Football is making apology for this happening! Good news is that official number of deaths is much smaller than first reports in American underground media!

Other good news is for fans of unbeaten Ole Miss Rebels, who is taking new #1 spot in Top Power 25 supercomputer ranking after glorious 23-0 beatdown victory over winless Jayhawks of Kansas in Week Four of Commie Football season. Rebels is replacing in top rank Texas A&M Aggies, who is also yet unbeaten, but is perhaps not winning with same feel of domination. Schedule is also being very nice for Ole Miss so far, with opponents who are not winning even one football game yet this season!

Week Four is featuring games with all teams from one District playing all teams from other District. Here is summary of important Week Four game results all around country (do NOT get this information from American underground media!):

  • District 1Temple Owls (4-0) is continuing rare, historic era of unbeaten glory with 28-11 win over Huskies of Washington, and flying high to #5 Top Power ranking; Penn State (3-1) is suffering first defeat of season, 46-16 to powerful Bruins of UCLA; this is creating three-way tie at top of South Division with Virginia Cavaliers (3-1, #22), who is surprise handing first loss to Oregon State, 40-11, and WVU (3-1) who is winning close 30-29 vs. Wazzou.
  • District 2: East Carolina (3-1) is tied for lead in North Division after 43-31 defeat of Texas Tech; NC State (3-1) is suffering first loss of season in 42-27 upset by Air Force; Kentucky Wildcats (4-0, #14) is continuing surprise season with 38-31 defeat of Colorado.
  • District 3: Notre Dame (4-0, #8) is already running away with North Division, three games ahead of pack after 44-7 ass-kick of sad SMU; Ohio State Buckeyes (3-1, #16) is leader in South Division, is eating much more victory rice than Rice University, who is being beaten by score of 48-24.
  • District 4: Ole Miss is not only undefeated team from Mississippi SSR! Quietly, like KGB agent, Mississippi State Bulldogs (4-0, #13) is remaining unbeaten after 36-18 victory over Illinois; Auburn Tigers (4-0, #9) is taking care of Northern Illinois by score of 45-18; oh, and also do not forget about 2013 champion Florida State Seminoles (4-0, #7), who is yet unbeaten following difficult 38-31 victory over defending District 5 champion Mizzou.
  • Speaking of District 5: Wisconsin Badgers (3-1, #25) is latest team to humiliate mysterious, underperforming, winless Crimson Tide of Alabama, by score of 23-20; Northwestern (3-1, #19) is beating UCF 28-12; Golden Gophers of Minnesota (3-1) is in North Division race with 24-10 victory over Vanderbilt; in South, Nebraska Cornhuskers (3-1, #20) is handling Miami Hurricanes 28-18; Hawkeyes of Iowa (3-1) is also winning 26-14 vs. Arkansas State.
  • District 6: Razorbacks of Arkansas (4-0, #11) is crushing Bowling Green 56-29; in West Division, is three unbeaten teams – Texas A&M is falling to #3 Top Power even with 43-28 victory over Cincinnati Bearcats; TCU Horned Frogs (4-0, #4) is continuing impressive start to season with 43-14 humbling of Marshall; sneaky Baylor Bears (4-0, #10) is showing it is still top team with 30-24 win over Louisville Cardinals.
  • District 7: Oklahoma Sooners (4-0, #15) is leading South after 39-34 close win vs. Clemson; Boise State (3-1) is very close 32-31 defeating of Tarheels of North Carolina; BYU (3-1) is in tie for North after 42-22 defeat of Georgia Tech.
  • District 8: Stanford (4-0) is climbing to #2 Top Power rank, after easy 46-13 victory over Navy; keeping Cardinal company at top of South Division is UCLA (4-0, #6) and USC (4-0, #12); Oregon State Beavers, Washington Huskies, and Oregon Ducks (#23) is all tied with 3-1 record at top of North Division.
A "Chanticleer" is a breed of ferocious rooster. Is pronounced "SHAN-TICKLER" like device used for tickling.

“Chanticleer” is rare species of ferocious rooster. Is pronounce “SHAN-TICKLER” like device that is used for tickling enemies. Is very common weapon in coastal villages of South Carolina SSR.


On Tier 2 level, everyone is learning proper way to say “Chanticleer” now that Coastal Carolina is 4-0 and #1 Top Power rank after defeating Coyotes of South Dakota 29-13. But is yet undefeated teams in every District of Tier 2.

UTEP Miners is making big leap from #9 to #3 in Top Power rank after 45-27 victory over previous unbeaten North Carolina A&T. Also making big jumps in Top Power rank is defending District 6 champion North Dakota State (from #17 to #5) who is beating defending District 3 champion South Carolina State 25-8. Texas State, Yale Bulldogs, Stephen F. Austin, and Alabama State is all surprise unbeaten teams moving into top 10 of Top Power rankings (calculated by advanced Soviet supercomputer).

But do not be dismissive of two very top teams from last season! North Texas Mean Green (3-1, #21) and Buffalo Bulls (3-1, #25) is both recovering from early season loss to now move into Top Power 25 after tough victories of Week Four. Season is yet young, like first growth of July springtime vegetation, under hard, icy soil of vast Siberian steppe.


If citizens of Mississippi SSR is loving this place “The Grove” and enjoying this thing named “Hotty Toddy” — is best course of action to not speak of rebellion.

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