2013 Champions! What, You Are Expecting Other Team?

Share Button

2013-champions-fsu
In very exciting finale (that is French word meaning final performance) to Commie Football season, is so close of finish that referees is having to look at instant replay for even many more minutes than is already looking during games! But in end, is Seminoles of Florida State who is defeating Oregon Ducks by only one point, final score 32-31, in championship Rose Bowl game. Only loss for Noles this season is Week Five loss to Crimson Tide, but FSU is later having revenge in District 4 Championship Game.

Maybe you are expecting some other team for champion? Fans of Commie Football is coming to expect what is unexpected, as when Utah State Aggies is surprise winner of championship last season. Some fans is saying, “Well, jeez – this is just the same thing that happened anyway! How is Commie Football a better or different system when we just wind up with the same champion as the stupid BCS?!”

If this is you, then you are needing to take deep breath. Here is why. Soviet supercomputer is taking many data into calculations to determine true college football champion. Is also making new, better schedule for all teams, so no champion is traveling easy path to victory. For 2013 Florida State Seminoles, instead of playing weak teams such as Bethune-Cookman and Idaho on way to BCS Championship, is instead in Commie Football playing strong schedule: Tulsa, LSU, South Florida, Rutgers, Alabama, Georgia, UCF, South Carolina, Miami (FL), Mississippi, Auburn, Florida, Alabama (again!), Missouri, Boston College, and finally Oregon. That is 16 games for championship glory, and not one is being easy. Okay, maybe Tulsa or South Florida, but Golden Hurricane is very good team last season! USF is even upgrade from Bethune!

What supercomputer is to confirm is that da, Florida State Seminoles is true best team in country for 2013 season. But! Auburn is not even being close to #2 best team. This team is Oregon Ducks, then Baylor Bears, then Louisville Cardinals (see final Top Power 25 rankings for end of season). Auburn is mere #25 in Top Power rank.

Believe or not, Seminoles and Ducks is finishing finishing season tied as #2 best offense, only behind Baylor. Is maybe better defense of FSU that is making difference in championship game? Only supercomputer is knowing for certain. Supercomputer is knowing every thing!

2013-champions-untTIER 2 CHAMPIONSHIP

Nyet, Florida State is not only champion of America. In Tier 2 of Commie Football, champion is Mean Green of North Texas, who are defeating very strong Buffalo Bulls by final score of 35-29.

Here are two teams that are being very even matched, both with very good offense and defense. Mean Green is maybe playing better game in high pressure situation, and this is making difference in end. UNT is also losing only one game this season, in Week Six to UTEP.

SOME TEAMS RISING & SOME TEAMS FALLING

For Tier 2 especially, is more excitement still coming, because after season is when process of promotion and relegation is happening. This is when some teams from Tier 2 are being promoted to Tier 1 for 2014 season, and some of worst Tier 1 teams is falling down to Tier 2. Fans of Tier 2 teams is having to keep in mind, that only schools who are coming from former FBS level is eligible for promotion to Commie Football Tier 1. So for fans of NDSU Bison, you are out of luck because NDSU is former FCS. What are factors for teams being chosen to rise or fall? Is combination of final record, Top Power scores, and attendance.

Promotion/Relegation announcement is coming in maybe one week or two. Is depending on finding enough wood for fire that is powering web server, so it is not freezing in polar vortex.

Tier 2 Semifinals: Nervous CSU Fans is Eating Tip of Horn

Share Button
Here is photograph of television set, showing miracle fan of Colorado State Rams, who is crying black tears when Rams is losing semifinal playoff game to Mean Green of North Texas.

Here is photograph of good television set, showing miracle fan of Colorado State Rams, who is crying dark green tears when beloved Rams is losing Tier 2 semifinal playoff game to Mean Green of North Texas.

When Commie Football season is reaching semifinal round of playoffs, each surviving team is having played 14 games. Is made hard like steel already from two fierce playoff battles and is not feeling scared of another fight.

This is making even low-seed teams, who are not looking like danger, such as Rams of Colorado State, most dangerous opponent of all opponents. Why? Because is sneaking up on you in alleyway, but you are not seeing because you are looking at bigger opponent far away, and then you are feeling thrust of knife bayonet for use with the 7.62 mm. Kalashnikov AK-47 assault rifle. Right through heart.

But in twist to this story, Mean Green of North Texas is able to defend against alleyway bayonet attack of CSU. Is instead, hearts of Colorado State Ram fans who are feeling heart stabbed with bayonet! This is also happening to fans of Memphis Tigers, in next alleyway.

t2-semi_2v8_playoff-banner

Game: Tier 2 Semifinal
Location: Denton, TX
Final Score: North Texas 32, Colorado State 31
Notes: For Rams, is sad finish to very good season that is starting very bad with 1-3 record. To make difficult journey to being only one, exciting point away from Tier 2 championship game is making fans proud, like runt pig of litter who is one day in future winning 4th place at regional soviet agricultural festival. This is very much more than fans of Colorado Buffaloes (3-9) or Falcons of Air Force (1-11) is saying at end of season! Is possible CSU and UNT is maybe being promoted to Tier 1 next football season?

Even small, one-point victory is victory, and Mean Green is now to advance to play maybe strongest team of Tier 2, Buffalo Bulls, for glorious honor of Tier 2 Championship!

t2-semi_3v5_playoff-banner

Game: Tier 2 Semifinal
Location: Memphis, TN
Final Score: Buffalo 31, Memphis 29
Notes: In other exciting semifinal game, is Bulls of Buffalo making only two-point victory over Memphis Tigers, in famous Liberty Bowl stadium. Here are two teams famous this season for mighty defense, but in end is Buffalo having little bit better offense that is making difference. Both teams is also deserving of maybe promotion to Tier 1 next season, fans are thinking.

Buffalo is only #5 playoff seed, but is playing very good offense and defense, and is now maybe favorite to win championship game against Mean Green of North Texas?

On to Championship

Tier 2 Championship game is traditional to be played in Kansas City, where is near middle of country, for fans who are having far to walk. What team will be new national champion of Tier 2? North Texas Mean Green or Buffalo Bulls?!

You are coming back to website next week to find out.

Tier 2 Playoffs: For Bison, Is Turning Dark Midnight

Share Button
ndsu-wicked-stepmother-newspaper

Chyort voz’mi! Is saying in newspaper that Colorado State Rams is Cinderella team, winning playoff game against North Dakota State, who is Wicked Stepmother team.

In second (quarterfinal) round of Tier 2 playoffs, big story is much familiar to Tier 1 playoffs. Top-seed team is playing home game against lowest, seed #8 team, who is traveling across country to have zadnitsa kicked by hooves of bison!

But this story is not what is happening. Instead, is underdog team with no things to lose that is coming into cocky stadium and finding new lake of strength, which is spraying out like geyser, and is playing best football game of young life! This team is capturing hearts of American football fans, and is becoming new Cinderella team, like in American Disney movie. In Commie Football Tier 2, this team is now Colorado State Rams, who is being Cinderella character, and Bison of North Dakota State is being wicked stepmother, who is now standing on sideline and watching Rams continue dancing in playoff games with handsome prince character, who in metaphor is maybe North Texas Mean Green. 

t2-quarter_1v8_playoff-banner

Game: Tier 2 Quarterfinal
Location: Fargo, ND
Final Score: Colorado State 35, North Dakota State 27
Notes: Like in Tier 1 Cotton Bowl, here is #1 seed team losing in defeat to #8 seed that is erupting like volcano, growing hot at right time. How is this? Rams is having best offense in Tier 2 this season. For Bison, is disappointing ending for second season in row, that is falling short in Commie Football playoffs. Is getting no easier for Colorado State, who is thinking is dancing with handsome prince, but is in truth facing sister of wicked stepmother – North Texas Mean Green – in semifinal game.

t2-quarter_2v7_playoff-banner

Game: Tier 2 Quarterfinal
Location: Denton, TX
Final Score: North Texas 43, Towson 27
Notes: Many is saying that North Texas is best team in Tier 2 all season long. Now, with easy victory over Towson, and NDSU out of way, Mean Green is new Top Power #1 team in Tier 2. Is having very good offense and defense is more strong than next opponent, Colorado State. And remember – Mean Green is sister of wicked stepmother, wearing clothing of handsome prince! For how long can magic playoff games last for Cinderella Rams? For Towson, is second season in row that Tigers is turning to pumpkins in Tier 2 playoffs.

t2-quarter_3v6_playoff-banner

Game: Tier 2 Quarterfinal
Location: Memphis, TN
Final Score: Memphis 27, Florida Atlantic 22
Notes: Memphis Tigers is not pumpkin, like Towson Tigers, but is more like real tiger – is hiding in bushes waiting to pounce, kill, and eat opponent. Latest jungle meal is looking like Owl of Florida Atlantic. Tigers is best defense remaining in Tier 2 playoffs, and is now to face Buffalo Bulls in semifinal. Maybe Bull is harder to kill than Owl? Or tiger is maybe liking taste of both, eh? FAU season is finish, but is hoping for maybe promotion to Tier 1 next season.

t2-quarter_4v5_playoff-banner

Game: Tier 2 Quarterfinal
Location: Orono, ME
Final Score: Buffalo 41, Maine 26
Notes: In rematch battle of cold teams from northeastern districts, Bulls of Buffalo is again to prove superior to Black Bears of Maine (Buffalo was also crushing Maine 51-11 in Week 11). Buffalo is now travel by Russian bus to warmer south of country to play Memphis Tigers in semifinal, who is having second-most explosive offense in playoffs, only behind Colorado State.

SEMIFINAL IS LAST GAME BEFORE FINAL CHAMPIONSHIP GAME

This weekend, all of world is finding out what two teams are playing for Tier 2 Commie Football championship!

  • (2) North Texas (13-1, #1) vs. (8) Colorado State (10-4, #7)
  • (3) Memphis (12-2, #3) vs. (5) Buffalo (11-3, #4)