Week 12: In St. Boz, All of Sooner Nation is Trusting

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St. Boz

Many fans of Oklahoma Sooners is making prayer to holy painting of St. Boz before victory in final game of regular season over Tulsa Golden Hurricane.

REGULAR SEASON IS FINISH

Upon completion of exciting Week 12 schedule, 2015 Commie Football regular season is reaching conclusion. Every fan is now restless with anticipation for Commie Football playoff, when 16 teams is entering tournament to determine true champion of American college football.

Is seeming only short time ago when Buckeyes of Ohio State is defeating Oregon Ducks 42-20 for 2014 championship (da, final result is same as in CFP system). In final week of 2015 regular season, defending champion Ohio State (8-4, #17 rank) is demonstrating difficulty of championship repeat, as Buckeyes is falling to Michigan State Spartans (9-3, #11) by 34-29 score, which is cruel to both, as this result is handing District 3 North division title to hated Michigan Wolverines (9-3, #10)!

Commie Football is world in which superior organization and schedule is producing interesting, unexpected result! Entire realm of American college football can only guess who new, true champion will become!

In meanwhile, drama in District 6 is reaching resolution, as top-ranked Oklahoma Sooners (11-1, #1) is making fresh farsh of little brother Tulsa Golden Hurricane (3-9) in 63-22 victory, to claim North division title over Oklahoma State Cowboys (10-2, #4), and for this reward – an invitation to District 6 Championship game against South division champion, Houston Cougars (8-4, #23).

At this time, you are forgetting about 80 teams not making to playoffs. Teams is now dead, like Trotsky! Think as if these teams is never existing, like American sasquatch (this is not same as yeti of Siberia, which is true living there). Is never too many bowl games with losing-record teams and corporation sponsor named after fruit!

YOU ARE READY FOR TRUE, BEST PLAYOFF SYSTEM, DA?

In korrumpirovanny College Football Playoff system, true opportunity for championship glory is for four teams, only. Teams is winning popularity beauty contest, ruled by alluring Condoleezza Rice. Many is killing and dying in argument over who is 4th best team in country! In superior Commie Football playoff system, is 16 TEAMS in hunt for title! And best yet, because of system of geographic Districts, football fans in every corner of country is having nearby hound in championship hunt!

Here is quick review of Commie Football playoff:

  1. 16 teams (from each Tier) is making to Round 1. Division winners is facing other Division winner from same District in District Championship game.
  2. In Round 2, eight District Champions is playing one another in seeded, single-elimination tournament to determine new champion.
  3. Round 3, is four teams left.
  4. National Championship Game

Is best system to find true champion! All must travel difficult 16-game schedule (12 regular season, then four playoff rounds) to seek ultimate championship glory!

CONTENDERS FOR CHAMPIONSHIP GLORY

TIER 1 PLAYOFF TRACKER

District 1:CONN vs. WVU
District 2:DUKE vs. CLEM
District 3:MICH vs.
MEMP
District 4:USF vs. MISS
District 5:ND vs.
IOWA
District 6:OKLA vs. UH
District 7:UTAH vs.
USAF
District 8:WASH vs. USC
Georgy told me I could say something about the Tier 1 playoffs, since Yale like, totally blew it on Tier 2 this season, and I stopped paying attention a while back (yeah, yeah – but I know they lost to Harvard this week, whatevs). I don’t really know what to say about Tier 1. I mean, at least UConn’s representing the same state, but who’s fooling who? Yale might even be able to beat UConn, looking at their offensive rating.

Here is information for which all college football fans is waiting with much patience. All Tier 1 division winner teams is traveling to District Championship Game (a.k.a. Round 1 of Commie Football playoffs):

  • District 1: Connecticut Huskies (8-4, #27) vs. West Virginia Mountaineers (8-4, #21) – In weak District 1, mediocre 8-4 record is enough to win both division titles! UConn is previous defeating WVU 37-19 long time ago in Week Five, but is now lower in Top Power ranking, with very bad 71st rank offense! But, is ferocious 3rd rank defense carrying Huskies into playoffs. WVU is flying below national radar, like MiG fighter jet, but is ending season with 4-game win streak, including high-pressure final week 43-11 defeat of Penn State (7-5) to seize division!
  • District 2: Duke Blue Devils (9-3, #14) vs. Clemson Tigers (9-3, #13) – Duke is winning final two games of regular season to remain one step ahead of North Carolina Tar Heels (8-4, #18) in standings, despite mediocre, 51st rank offense. Who is responsible for Blue Devils most recent loss? Why, is Clemson in Week Ten! Tigers is also possessing unexciting offense (47th) and defense (27th) output, but is playing overall more difficult schedule than Duke, requiring three victories at end of season to remain ahead of surprise sweetheart of America team, Appalachian State (8-4, #30)!
  • District 3: Michigan Wolverines (9-3, #10) vs. Memphis Tigers (8-4, #26) – Wolverines was #1 Top Power rank team for two weeks consecutive early in season, but is then making stumbles, including losses to Indiana Hoosiers (7-5), Ohio State (8-4), and opponent in championship, Memphis Tigers in Week Six. Tigers is clinching weak South division early on strength of lightning, 9th rank offense, despite strange losses to weak teams such as Vanderbilt (5-7) and Louisiana Tech (5-7).
  • District 4: South Florida Bulls (10-2, #3) vs. Ole Miss Rebels (9-3, #7) – Miracle USF is perhaps most surprise team of season. With good-enough offense (25th) and strong defense (10th), Bulls is going 4-1 in loaded East division, losing only to Florida State (8-4, #15) in entire District! This is including Week Ten victory over Ole Miss, who is making return appearance to playoffs. Defense (24th) is perhaps not as good as last season, but offense (16th) is making pleasant humming sound, winning division on strength of Week Two victory over Crimson Tide of Alabama (9-3, #8).
  • District 5: Notre Dame Fighting Irish (9-3, #5) vs. Iowa Hawkeyes (11-1, #2) – First season in new district is lucky for Irish, who is falling no lower than #18 Top Power rank during entire season, clinching division early so that 35-28 loss to Wisconsin Badgers (8-4, #16) in final game of season is of no importance. Good balance of offense (17th) and defense (15th), and very difficult schedule is making Irish true contender. Hawkeyes is making return to playoffs, this time as top contender with very strong defense (5th), losing only one game in Week Five to… uh oh, it was to Irish!
  • District 6: Oklahoma Sooners (11-1, #1) vs. Houston Cougars (8-4, #23) – Sooners is making return appearance to playoffs, but from different District. Top-rank offense is ensuring many victories with 46 points/game on average. Only loss is in Week Two to “Bedlam” rival Oklahoma State (10-2, #4), who is sad staying home. Houston is losing first two games of season, then exploding with 6th rank offense to win four games in division, including Baylor Bears (7-5). Close Week Ten loss to Oklahoma is giving Cougars hope of victory on second attempt!
  • District 7: Utah Utes (9-3, #12) vs. Air Force Falcons (8-4, #29) – 12th rank defense of Utah is smothering opponents as Utah is winning final five games of season. But this is first meeting of season with Air Force, who is surprise champion of weak South division, playing steady for most part except in embarrassing 71-31 loss to Texas Tech (5-7) in final game of season. How is this score possible for playoff team?
  • District 8: Washington Huskies (9-3, #9) vs. USC Trojans (9-3, #6) – Huskies is having very powerful offense (13th) and defense (11th), defeating USC in Week Six, but then experiencing strange mid-season spell of losing immediately after. Trojans is requiring dramatic final week victory over Stanford Cardinal (8-4, #19) to take South division and return to playoffs.

Later in week is official revealing of all 16 Tier 2 playoff teams. (In meantime, here is hint – Week 12 standings, scoreboard, and Top Power rankings is providing necessary information to know ultimate fate of Tier 2 regular season and playoff lineup. Please keep as secret.)

Week 10: Who Shall Seize Ticket for Ride on Playoff Train?

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Teams traveling to playoff game is having many option for transport. Train is sometimes too expensive or idle due to war. This is when team is transport to game with oxen and wagon group.

Is customary for Commie Football playoff teams to travel at no cost to self. But for when train is idle due to coal shortage, team is transporting to game using many wagons and oxen.

 TIER 1 PLAYOFF TRACKER

District 1:North Champ
vs. South Champ
District 2:North Champ
vs. South Champ
District 3:North Champ vs.
MEMP
District 4:East Champ
vs. West Champ
District 5:North Champ vs.
IOWA
District 6:North Champ
vs. South Champ
District 7:North Champ vs.
USAF
District 8:North Champ
vs. South Champ

IS ONLY SMALL NUMBER OF TICKETS AVAILABLE FOR RIDE ON PLAYOFF TRAIN

Week Ten of Commie Football season is witnessing first few teams who is earning ticket to District Championship game (aka first round of playoffs). Pozdravleniya to Memphis Tigers (District 3 South), Iowa Hawkeyes (District 5 South), and Falcons of Air Force (District 7 South), who is all earning this honor on Tier 1 level.

But you are saying “wait” with one hand in air. You are making look of confusion! Two of three teams is not very high rank in new Top Power Rankings!

Remember – first round of 16-team playoff is also championship game of each District. When team is winning its 6-team Division, is then advancing to District championship, then seeded playoff against seven other District champions. What is this, you are thinking is better to have group of American business tycoon and krasivaya Condoleezza Rice make decision of who is best teams in country, rather than good system?!

NYET, comrade. Commie Football is best system for all of college football, with fan from every corner of large country having close team in best competition for true national championship! Because of fair schedule system for all teams, winner in each District is truly deserving of respect across entire nation! Da, sometimes one District is weaker than next, but is crime to speak of this as problem.

Here is review of important games of Week 10:

  • In District 1 North, UConn (7-3, #24 rank) is leading playoff race after 21-13 win vs. Terps of Maryland; Playoff dream of Boston College Eagles (6-4) is diminish after 28-14 loss to WVU Mountaineers (6-4); Virginia Cavaliers (5-5) is also spoil hope of Temple Owls (6-4) with 38-30 victory; Is Penn State (7-3, #19) in control of South following easy 47-16 victory vs. Army Black Knights.
  • District 2: Clemson Tigers (7-3, #18 rank) is fight way to front of South division race after 34-20 win vs. North division leader Duke (7-3); Appalachian State (6-4) is losing again, 50-22 to Tarheels of North Carolina (6-4), who is trying to catch Blue Devils. Georgia Bulldogs (6-4) is yet also in race after 27-15 victory vs. NC State.
  • District 3: Defending champion Ohio State Buckeyes (8-2, #7 rank) is hope for repeat, now in control of North division after 35-16 victory vs. Red Wolves of Arkansas State; Despite better Top Power rank, Wolverines of Michigan (8-2, #4) is behind OSU in standings due to Week 7 loss, but is yet in playoff hunt after 35-29 win vs. Kentucky Wildcats; In only second season on Tier 1 level, Memphis Tigers (7-3, #20 rank) is securing South division title and playoff berth with 41-38 defeat of Indiana Hoosiers.
  • District 4: Amazing South Florida Bulls (8-2, #9 rank) is winning shock 35-27 victory vs. Ole Miss (7-3, #13) to take step closer to East division title; Florida State (7-3, #10) is on Bull heels after 49-14 defeat of Ragin’ Cajuns; Alabama Crimson Tide (7-3, #12 rank) is catching Ole Miss in West division playoff chase after easy 39-9 victory vs. UCF; Gators of Florida (6-4) 28-14 win over LSU (6-4) is perhaps killing playoff dream of Tigers.
  • District 5: Notre Dame (8-2, #5 rank) is at top of North after 26-12 defeat of Kansas Jayhawks; Wisconsin Badgers (7-3, #11) is waiting in wing after 21-16 win vs. Mizzou; In South, is Iowa Hawkeyes (9-1, #3 rank) clinching second straight District 5 championship appearance with 31-24 victory vs. Purdue.
  • District 6: Strange situation in North is continuing with Oklahoma Sooners (9-1) defeating South division leader Houston Cougars (7-3, #16) 39-34 to maintain #1 Top Power rank, yet behind “Bedlam” rival Oklahoma State Cowboys (9-1, #2) in division standings and playoff race, after OSU is easy defeating Texas State 59-20.
  • District 7: Utah Utes (7-3, #25 rank) is seizing control of North in 46-23 victory vs. UTEP; Arizona Wildcats (5-5) is destroying Boise State (6-4) 50-21 in upset to damage Bronco playoff dream; Air Force Falcons (7-3, #23 rank) is beating Utah State Aggies 35-28 to claim South division title and place in District Championship game!
  • District 8: Golden Bears of Cal (7-3, #22 rank) is upset beating rival Stanford (8-2, #8) 46-30 to claim mythic Stanford Axe and remain in North division playoff picture; UCLA Bruins (7-3, #14 rank) 27-24 victory vs. Washington Huskies (7-3) is making playoff race tighter in both divisions; USC Trojans (8-2, #6 rank) is holding lead in South following 41-24 victory vs. Oregon State Beavers.
TIER 2 PLAYOFF TRACKER

District 1:North Champ
vs. South Champ
District 2:JMU vs. South Champ
District 3:North Champ
vs. South Champ
District 4:WKU vs. South Champ
District 5:North Champ
vs. South Champ
District 6:North Champ
vs. South Champ
District 7:East Champ vs.
NEES
District 8:WYO vs. South Champ

HERE IN CABOOSE OF PLAYOFF TRAIN, IS PASSENGERS FROM TIER 2 LEVEL

Do not forget about exciting playoff race, also on Tier 2 level! Is three more teams to join Wyoming Cowboys (District 8 North), who is first to clinch ticket last week. James Madison Dukes (District 2 North), Western Kentucky Hilltoppers (District 4 North), and Cowboys of McNeese State (District 7 West, but not blood relative of Wyoming Cowboys) is now also with seats on playoff train.

WHERE IS WEEKLY SUPPLY OF COAL?

Speaking of train, is reminder of coal for running steam engine. Is much past time for Bobby and Intern Kyle to bring new load of coal from small subterrain mining operation, beneath Emergency Secondary Headquarters. I am telling many times that this duty is to perform once each week, to ensure adequate coal supplies. But these American college interns – is very forgetful if you are not telling instruction in some way with video monitor.

Week Seven: Remembered Shame is Fuel of Later Victory

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SHAME! Is common feeling in Commie Football.

SHAME! Is common feeling in Commie Football.

LAZY AMERICANS. SO EAGER TO DRIVE SUPERHIGHWAY, AVOID ROAD OF DIRT.

In every old capitalist college football system – NCAA, FBS, BCS, or CFP – is very common for team to be perfect 7-0 by this time of season. Why is this? Is because of nonsense conference system! Is because of incentive to pack schedule full with cupcake games, like young piglet stuffing for later slaughter! Is because of artificial popularity poll made by undeserving committee, a creation of hungry-for-advertising-revenue American television corporation, who is then saying every game is with very best teams! Bred sivoy kobyly!

Uggggh. Boooooored! Georgy is all like, TOTALLY obsessed with teaching us about Soviet military history, and I’m just like, barely awake… Leningrad, Novgorod, Stalingrad, Ostrogozhsk–Rossosh… BLUURRRGGG. Pass the kvass! Know what I’m sayin’? Anyway, I’m learning a lot, I guess. Oh, and what else was there… maybe just that… HARVARD’S STILL NUMBER ONE TOP POWER RANKING ON TIER 2, baby! Kyle, did you see that? I find that very interesting. I find that to be exceptional, don’t you think? The Russians love them some CRIMSON, amirite? Oh, but SIGGGH. It’s so lonely on the top. Perhaps the 1% know the pain of which I speak? Yeah, Georgy’s all like, fired up about the Battle of Kharkov or whatever, and I’m just like “DUDE. You don’t GET IT.” You know? Because I’m like, FREAKING OUT right now after Yale beat UMass this week. 36 to 34. And I know Yale’s like, still only 2-5 and totally in last place in the Tier 2, District 1 North division, and it’s not like it’s gonna be easy to get past Southern Miss and, YEAH, FINE – Harvard in the last game of the season. Aw, man – wouldn’t it be SWEET if Yale totally won out and Harvard lost the rest of their games, and it came down to the final game of the year – Harvard’s 7 and 4 and Yale’s 6 and 5 – and Yale totally beats Harvard’s ass and WINS THE DIVISION based on head-to-head tiebreaker? Dude! You would NOT be able to deny – that would be a total SIGN FROM GOD about what I’m supposed to do to Bobby.

When top college football team is suffering even one loss in antiquated system of NCAA, fans is weeping like drunken American debyutantka in nightclub bathroom, cursing before-favorite coach and young players. Football critics is saying is impossible for this team to now win “invitation” to miniature CFP playoff for make championship game.

Reaction is ridiculous! Is demonstration of weakness! Did Soviet Union quit war following disaster in First Battle of Kiev? NYET! Did fall of Kharkov result in Soviet surrender? NYET! One or two losing battles is not meaning war is finish!

PAIN NOW FOR LATER GLORY, IS POSSIBLE

Before Week Seven of Commie Football season, is only eight remaining unbeaten teams total, on both Tier 1 and Tier 2 levels. Now, is even less! Washington Huskies (6-1) is losing first game of season by 31-29 score to back-from-dead Oregon Ducks (2-5). Also in District 8, California Golden Bears (6-1) is falling in defeat for first time by score 43-33 to Cougars of Washington State (4-3). Only one team is remaining unbeaten on Tier 1 level – but how long can Stanford Cardinal (7-0), who is enjoying easy 31-17 victory over Hawaii in Week Seven, remain without blemish, like rare Isaak Brodsky painting?

On Tier 2 level, is more damage for unbeaten teams! James Madison, Georgia Southern, and Sam Houston State is all suffering first loss of season in Week Seven.

Is season now over for Huskies and Cal? Should JMU, Georgia Southern, and Sam Houston abandon schedule and quit season? Is championship dream over for any team with only one loss?

NYET! Is only one battle! Full Commie Football season is long war, and is yet many opportunity for enough victory to make 16-team playoff and possible championship! Is fact – only teams with six or seven losses is already ineligible for playoff, but this is now include only 13 of 96 teams on Tier 1 level!

But da, single loss in playoff is resulting in immediate death.

Here is summary of results for exciting Week 7 games in Commie Football:

  • District 1: Temple Owls (5-2) is defeating Syracuse 24-17, moving back into tie for North division lead with Rutgers, who is losing 40-22 in medieval battle between Scarlet Knights and Black Knights of Army (3-4); Pitt Panthers (2-5) is tasting delicious nectar of 27-25 victory vs. nemesis Nittany Lions (4-3); WVU (4-3) is taking advantage with 29-22 victory vs. Navy Midshipmen to stay in South division playoff race.
  • District 2: Blue Devils (6-1, #8 rank) 35-28 victory vs. East Carolina is giving Duke a two-game lead in North division; Georgia Bulldogs (4-3) is teaching upstart Appalachian State (5-2, #20) a hard lesson in 26-19 victory; Clemson (5-2, #24) is destroying Tennessee Vols in 39-7 annihilation, to claim South division lead.
  • District 3: Buckeyes (5-2, #21 rank) is treating arch rival Michigan Wolverines (5-2, #13) to 30-16 beatdown; Michigan State (5-2, #17) is exploding all over Ohio Bobcats 67-17 to create 3-way tie with UM and OSU for North division lead; Memphis Tigers (5-2, #18) is surging with power to 54-29 victory vs. Kentucky Wildcats, to take lead in South.
  • District 4: South Florida Bulls (6-1, #10 rank) is destroying nemesis UCF 49-12 to maintain East division lead; Seminoles of FSU (5-2, #12) is lurking just behind after 37-11 victory vs. Miami Hurricanes; Ole Miss (5-2, #16) is recapturing advantage in West division with 28-12 victory vs. Louisiana Tech; Mississippi State (3-4) is clanging cowbell, defeating Crimson Tide (5-2, #22) in huge 28-17 upset victory; LSU (5-2) is missing good opportunity with embarrassing 34-30 defeat to usual weak Ragin’ Cajuns of Louisiana-Lafayette (4-3).
  • District 5: Fighting Irish (6-1, #3 rank) is making quiet comeback in Top Power rankings, fighting off Northwestern (5-2, #15) in key 31-29 victory; Iowa Hawkeyes (6-1, #4) is defeating Kansas State (5-2) 25-14 in equal critical South division game; Mizzou (6-1, #5) is sharing lead of South division following 24-18 victory vs. Cyclones of Iowa State
  • District 6: Oklahoma State (6-1) is gushing like Baku oil well up to #2 Top Power rank after 62-26 domination victory of Tulsa Golden Hurricane; Meanwhile, Oklahoma Sooners (6-1, #6) 55-40 win vs. Razorbacks of Arkansas is moving OU into 3-way tie for North division lead; Horned Frogs of TCU (6-1, #7) is third team in tie after easy 43-21 win vs. SMU; In South division, Houston Cougars (5-2, #25) is surprise beating Baylor Bears 43-27 in upset victory, is now tie for South lead with Texas A&M (5-2) who is embarrassing losing by score 21-19 to little Texas State Bobcats!
  • District 7: Defending Tier 2 champion Colorado State Rams (4-3) is surprising Boise State (5-2, #14 rank) in 26-24 upset victory; Air Force Falcons (4-3) is remaining in hunt for South division title with 37-19 victory vs.  ASU Sun Devils; Arizona Wildcats (4-3) is beating UTEP 38-29 to maintain tie for South division lead.
  • District 8: Oregon Ducks (2-5) is finally winning games, ruining perfect season of Washington Huskies (6-1, #9 rank) in 31-29 upset win; Wazzu (4-3) is also wrecking perfect season of Cal Golden Bears (6-1, #11) with 43-33 upset victory; Stanford (7-0, #1 rank) is last remaining unbeaten Tier 1 team after 31-17 win vs. Rainbow Warriors of Hawaii.

ON TIER 2, HERE IS NEWS OF TOP FIVE TEAMS

Harvard Crimson (7-0, #1 rank) is continue success with 39-18 victory vs. Brown to maintain #1 Top Power rank; In best game of week, featuring two unbeaten teams, McNeese State Cowboys (7-0, #2) is defeating Sam Houston State 29-25 to seize control of District 7 playoff race; Toledo Rockets (6-1, #3) is continue to fly high in 36-29 over Chippewas of Central Michigan; Southern Miss (6-1, #4) is efficient defeating of Samford by score 50-23; 2014 runner-up Western Kentucky Hilltoppers (6-1, #5) is climbing again near top of hill after 34-28 over Georgia State.

Playoffs: Two Worlds, On Course for Collision

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National championship game will be held in Orange Bowl next week. Travel to Florida SSR is very difficult for fans of Oregon and Ohio State, so government is providing radio broadcast for fans in Oregon SSR and Ohio SSR, only.

National championship game will be held in Orange Bowl next week. Long journey to Florida SSR is very difficult for fans of Ducks and Buckeyes. As show of goodwill towards American people, Soviet government is providing special radio broadcast, in Russian, for all to hear game.

World of Commie Football is strange, parallel universe, bringing order to former chaotic system of determining American college football champion. Some critic is saying that Commie Football supercomputer is producing impossible result, as when Utah State Aggies is winning 2012 championship. But then, only one season ago, Commie Football supercomputer is crowning same champion (Florida State) as ludicrous BCS system, when Seminoles is narrow defeating Oregon Ducks. After, is more complaints, asking in whining voice – what is this proving, when superior Soviet system is producing same result as terrible, capitalist BCS system?

First, take deep breath. Then slow exhale breath, then TAKE DEEPER BREATH ONCE MORE! NOW SLAP OWN FACE! AGAIN! HARDER! Now stop and continue reading.

Is simple. Even corrupt capitalist system, such as nonsense NCAA, is sometimes having good luck. Either this, or obvious one team is true best team in all worlds of college football.

Sometimes, stupid American system for deciding college champion – whether AP poll, BCS, CFP – is having lucky streak, two years consecutive! Is long way to say – this season, advanced Commie Football algorithm is finding same two teams in championship game as flawed College Football Playoff system! Drisnya! In the name of Condoleezza!

r3-t1-rosebowl

Game: Rose Bowl
Location: Pasadena, CA
Final Score: Oregon 32, Ole Miss 25
Notes: Last season, Oregon is losing championship game to Florida State by only one point. During offseason, fans of Ducks is not sleeping, rolling over on hay mattress again and again, making many trips to outdoor latrine with only one thought – why is this team, which is so good for entire regular season, failing to win championship?

This season, Ducks is experiencing early frustration – beating darlings of 2013 Louisville and Boston College, but also losing to bitter District 8 rivals, Cal Golden Bears and UCLA. Then, beginning in Week Six, Oregon is resembling MiG fighter jet on secret KGB mission – to shoot down and destroy all enemies and fly to top of Top Power 25 rankings AGAIN! Mission is success so far – Oregon is once again advancing to national championship game, this time to play Ohio State, to determine true champion of all college football.

r3-t1-fiestabowl

Game: Fiesta Bowl
Location: Glendale, AZ
Final Score: Ohio State 32, TCU 31
Notes: In most exciting contest of playoff semifinal round, Ohio State is defeating tough TCU by only one point, to advance to championship game against top-seed Oregon Ducks. Why is Buckeyes proving too hard of nut for Horned Frogs to puncture? Soviet supercomputer is finding that in order to win this game, top-rank offense and #4-rank defense of Buckeyes is needing every milligram of strength to defeat TCU, who is also bringing powerful balance of offense (#4) and defense (#10), and also #1 in perception of disrespect!

Even in defeat, fans of Horned Frogs is proud – team is rising from mediocre 6-6 team last season, making Commie Football playoffs for first time, almost advancing to championship game! Is perhaps good enough in ESPN world, but not Commie Football. Do svidaniya, Horned Frogs!

In day or two, we are telling what is happening on Tier 2 semifinal games.

Return next week to find out WHO IS HAVING BIGGEST O!